Society is kind of twisted when a guy is friendly to a girl and her first instinct is "creep". But that's how it is. Our culture has some how mutated to the point that friendly is no longer the norm, and what isn't norm is like, creepy. I'm guilty of this. I don't know how to react sometimes when a guy is friendly, whether he's physically attractive or not, friendly can just seem creepy. It's almost like the jerks seem easier to approach than someone who is super friendly. Now nice is different. For some reason nice doesn't seem creepy like friendly is. What the exact distinction between the two is... quite frankly I haven't a clue.
It is a very fine line that is nearly impossible to define. I can imagine this puts guy into some distress. If they want the attention of a girl, they don't know how to act around her. If he's a jerk, most likely she won't be interested in him. If he's friendly, he's going to creep her out and just make her run in the complete opposite direction. He can try being nice, but being nice can imply he isn't interested in her, like interested in her, and in return she will put him in the friend zone. My advice? Just quite while you're behind.

I feel bad for the fellas, I really do.

Being able to interact with the opposite sex seems like it has to be a natural ability. One either has it or they don't.

And now the wall goes up.

What do you do when your world has been turned upside down and the one you would usually go to, the one who would fix it and let you know everything is going to be ok, is the one who in fact, turned your world upside down?

And the sickest thing about the situation is that I love/loved (is there a difference?) him so much that I'm glad I am the one suffering with this heart break. I would never wish this kind of pain upon him. Ironically enough my silver lining is that it is me having to deal with this, not him.

Chocolate is the best medicine

Relationships can make you the happiest individual in the world, or the most miserable. It all depends on the status you have with that person. And when the status seems to go sour, that can make one absolutely hate life. It's hardest when things use to be so perfect. How does it happen that feelings change? That relationships grow apart? What causes that all to happen? Or what causes one person in the relationship's status to change from the others'? Why can't both be consistent and in sync? How can one say that they care about the other but have their actions show no such thing? Why is it so difficult to be straight forward and honest? How can one seem so great to the other and then all of sudden seem drab and dull? Is it because they have met someone else? What if they haven't? Then what is the answer? How can one continue to be so selfish when they see the other is bending backwards to try and maintain the relationship during difficult times? It's a team effort, right? And yet, how can one be too busy to try and explain what they mean when they say "It just doesn't seem to be working"?  So what does that mean? How can it be so difficult to simply say whether it is or is not worth fixing? Like they need a checklist of what the relationship entails and then be able to determine if they want to commit or not. WHO CARES ABOUT THE FUCKING CHECKLIST. The other individual either is or is not worth keeping in one's life and once decided which, (hopefully rather promptly, and if not, that is an answer in its self, don't you think?) the individual needs to act on that decision. Sometimes there is no "riding the fence" option.

Turning Japanese, I think I'm turning Japanese

I find it really frustrating when I have an idea that I want to elaborate, but once I finally get onto blogger I can't think of the insightful post I wanted to share. Fortunately I now have blogger on my phone so sharing creativity is just a few touches away (Yes. I have the iPhone and am in love with it). 

haphazard.

It's a vicious whirlwind of a cycle and impossible to escape.

GBV lyrics never fail me, sometimes I feel like I cant relate to them without really understanding why. It's like certain phrases jump out at me and everything seems to fall into place afterwards.

No, I am not high. I just love GBV.

Hey little girl would you stop and just lay back
It's so hard to believe that you're so sad
And I know we just keep talking about it
In a swirl bunch of nothing turned inside out
I don't care what you do anymore

The line that stood out to me initially was the last one. 


In the words of T.S. Eliot... 
"Genuine poetry can communicate before it is understood." 

Robert Pollard's lyrics must be genuine poetry. 

I hate the video pop ups.

Weed isn't a drug so quit acting like you a thug

social error.

I am like an overly proud parent when it comes to talking about my boyfriend. Yes, I am one of those girls. I never thought I would be, but this particular boy has made me gone completely off track. I am no longer an ice queen, and though being aware of that particular fact makes me capable of altering it, I don't want to. I know it sounds ridiculous, getting all wrapped up in someone, actually feeling like a better person because of them, etc... but it is true.

I have become one of those girls I loathed in my earlier years, that I swore that I would never become. I know enjoy sappy love stories, can express my feelings, even cry. I can let my guard down, I'm ok with someone knowing everything about me, I might even want him to...